[Portman]

All the Serie A talk here (non-Milan)!

[dst]

This season’s news today!
Ten things you’ll read about this season…

In an effort to keep you up to date with the Italian game, Football Italia brings you a brief rundown of the big stories likely to hit the newsstands this season

Ronaldo linked with Inter return
Because nothing beats flogging a dead chipmunk. Considering his recent weight gain, it’s believed Ronie’s nickname will be upgraded to ‘The Walrus of Football.’

Mauro Camoranesi fined by Juve
If he was out of control before, turning up late to training, demanding transfers in the Press, repeatedly getting sent off for the most pointless of reaction fouls, then imagine what the unhappy Oriundo will be like forced to play in Serie B?

Coppa Italia win rescues Inter’s season
Juventus are out of the picture, Milan have an eight-point penalty and the Nerazzurri have signed every player on the planet. Who could possibly mess this up? Inter.

Christian Vieri joins (insert club here) in January
Bobo finally embraces his true calling as a travelogue writer with his new book ‘Around the football world in 80 days.’

Cristiano Lucarelli in Aldo Spinelli row
Like Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, the on-off relationship will keep newspapers happy for months recycling the same tales of arguments, passion and a relationship on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

Coppa a key objective, says Coach
It doesn’t matter who, the same cliché will float to the surface just before they field a bunch of acne-ridden teenagers and ‘promising’ foreign loan players for that decisive Coppa Italia clash.

Refs slammed for errors
Luciano Moggi is gone, Calciopoli cleared the cobwebs, but the Italian tradition of insulting referees for even the slightest mistake – then insisting they’re still the best in the world – will continue unabated.

San Siro clubs complain about turf
The pitch is re-laid every three months with grass flown in from every corner of the globe, but the highest paid players in Italy are still going to spend half of every game tapping a clump of turf back into position. There are plans to include the gardener in the MilanLab staff.

Chivu ready for Real Madrid
What Fabio Capello wants, Fabio Capello gets. The serial poacher has plucked his old clubs dry and Roma’s Romanian defender Cristian Chivu is next on the list. If you invite Don Fabio round to dinner, be sure to count the cutlery before he leaves.

Ibra punches Adriano in training ground brawl
Hopefully with ‘This town ain’t big enough for the both of us’ playing in the background while Zlatan ‘Psycho’ Ibrahimovic goes mano a mano with Adriano ‘The Not So Gentle Giant.’


Football Italia

This post has been edited by dst: Sep 6 2006, 04:16 PM